How to Actively Pray For Your Husband

This post contains affiliate links. As an Amazon Affiliate, I can earn a commission off of products at no additional cost to you. You can read my full disclosure here.

Recently I’ve been really focused on how to actively pray for your husband. When I first decided to start praying for him, I’ll admit it was because of a selfish motive. It’s not that I wanted my husband to change or our marriage to improve; I just realized that if he succeeds, I (and really our whole family) succeed with him.

Once I started actively praying for him, I noticed some major changes in him, our relationship, and our family. Mainly, I noticed that I had been seriously neglecting him up until this point. As his wife, praying for him is a sure fire way to let him know that you’re 100% on his side.

Prayer Shifts Your Focus

I also became more aware of how I changed when I started to pray for my spouse. It’s harder to be angry or stay angry at someone when you’re praying for them on a day to day basis. Additionally, I started to become aware of my own shortcomings and problems and how I was handling our relationship in a selfish, immature way.

When you start to actively pray for your husband, you become more “we” focused, rather than “I”. You’re on a team and you want to see your team succeed. As I started to pray for my husband, I started to pray that God would work on my heart. I prayed that God would change my own selfishness and put my husband’s needs first.

I know in today’s age, that sounds backwards or possibly even oppressive. It’s not, though. If we truly love our spouse and want the best for them, then putting our selfish desires aside is the next active step.

How Do I Start?

When I decided I was going to start praying for him on a regular basis, I didn’t know where to start. I knew I wanted to pray more than just “help him to have a good day”, “bless his work”, and “keep him safe”. After doing quite a bit of research online, I came up with a list of specific requests I pray for him which I’m sharing below with you.

What I did was divide my prayers for him into separate categories. I then found Bible verses that dealt directly with those categories and (in many instances) used their verbiage or phrases to shape my words in my own prayers.

It’s important to note that this is not a word for word prayer I say every day for my husband. Rather, it’s something that guides my words. This makes it more personal for me. Especially when I know he’s currently struggling in one area more than others, I can spend more time praying in that area and this allows me to do that as I feel led.

Pray For His Relationships Outside His Family

Your husband has so many people that are relying on him each day. Sometimes we forget how big that burden can be. Aside from his family (especially if he is the sole bread winner), he has a boss and coworkers that are placing expectations onto him.

He has friends who he needs to encourage him and give him advice and counsel. Given different leadership positions he may find himself in (church, volunteer organizations, coaching, etc.), that list is ever increasing. This is specifically what I pray for:

• God would give him more “Iron Sharpens Iron” type friendships (Proverbs 27:17)
• God would give him friends that love at all times (Proverbs 17:17) and stick closer than a brother (Proverbs 18:24)
• Teach him how to be an “Iron” friend (Proverbs 27:17)
• Give him wisdom to choose his friends carefully (Proverbs 12:26)
• Give him wise companions that give him wise counsel; help him to walk with the wise (Proverbs 13:20)
• Help him to obtain favor with his boss (Luke 2:52)

Pray For His Spiritual Walk

• Give him boldness: there’s several ways that God wants us to use boldness. They’re outlined below:
  • that he would speak the word of God boldly (Acts 4:29, 31)
  • that he would have the boldness as a lion rather than flee when no man is chasing him (Proverbs 28:1)
  • that he would boldly approach the throne of grace to obtain mercy and help (Hebrews 4:16)
• Help him to grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord (2 Peter 3:18)
• Show him how to act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with God (Micah 6:8)
• Teach him how to guard his heart (Proverbs 4:23)
• Give him a desire for wisdom; help him to continually seek wisdom (Proverbs 4:7)
• That he would walk in a manner worthy of his calling (Ephesians 4:1)
• that he would remain rooted and grounded in love (Ephesians 3;16-19)
• Give him a fear of the Lord so that he can depart from evil (Proverbs 16:6)
• give him a hunger and thirst for righteousness (Matthew 5:6); encourage him to seek God with all his heart (2 Chronicles 7:14); teach him how to love God with all his heart, soul, and mind (Matthew 22:37)
• Give him the ability to stand up over temptations (1 Corinthians 10:9)

Pray for His Work

• Ask God to establish the work of his hands (Psalm 90:17)
• Ask God to guide his steps (Psalm 32:8)
• Help him to bear fruit in every good work (Colossians 1:10)
• that he would commit his work to God (Proverbs 16:3)
• that he would work heartily (Colossians 3:23)
• that he would be skillful in his work (Proverbs 22:29)
• bless his work so that he can share with others in need (Ephesians 4:28)
• that he would work with his might (Ecclesiastes 9:10)
• that he would grow in wisdom, stature, and favor with God and man (Luke 2:52)

Pray for His Relationships with his Family

• that he would not provoke his children to anger (Ephesians 6:4)
• that his desire would be for me, his wife, only (Proverbs 5:16-19)
• that he would show honor to his wife (me) and his prayers won’t be hindered (I Peter 3:7)
• that the word of Christ would dwell in him richly so he can teach and admonish his family in all wisdom (Colossians 3:16)

Pray for Yourself

At the end of all of this list, don’t forget about your role. By the time I get through this list, I’m convicted, myself, of all that I need to be so that my husband can be who God wants him to be. I typically close by praying that I would be the wife he needs me to be. Specifically, I ask:

• help me to be a better helpmeet
• help me to see him and love him the way Christ does
• show me how to respect him the way I’m called to
• teach me how to encourage him and build him up (1 Thessalonians 5:11)

Lastly,

My one final thought that I believe really changed the direction of my marriage (on top of praying for him) was speaking with him about what I can pray with him about. I wish I could say we do this every night; I can say that we do this at least once a week.

What I mean is we find a designated time (typically it’s after the littles are in bed) that we sit down and write out our plans and goals. It starts out with what’s going on tomorrow so that we’re on the same page. Then, we expand to include the weekly plans, monthly goals, and lastly, we talk about dreams.

Once we’ve gone through everything that we can think of, we pray together. Not only does this bring us closer, but it also gives me specific needs that I can pray for him over throughout that whole week until we do it again.

Spill Your Thoughts

How have you actively prayed for your husband in your marriage? What changes have you noticed since you began? Drop your thoughts in the comments below. If you enjoyed this post, be sure to check out my other post about praying for your friendships.